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Maybe I Should've Walked Away, but I'm Choosing to Stay

Maybe I Should've Walked Away, but I'm Choosing to Stay

By: Erica Alisse

Any sane person would have left a long time ago. But I don’t know how to walk away.

More importantly, I don’t want to. I don’t want to give up on us.

The thing is… I don’t need you. I know I don't. I’m not staying out of desperation or fear. I’m staying because I choose to.

Maybe I used to, but I don’t rely solely on you for my happiness anymore. I believe in myself enough to know that I can be okay on my own. I just don’t want to have to try.

If I walked away now, I would have regrets. I would miss you like hell. And I may never get over you completely. But eventually, I would survive it.

Despite everything we’ve been through, I still see a future with you. I still believe that we can get past all of this and be good together again. I think we could be great.

I’m still holding onto the hope that you’ll realize what you have right in front of you, and that you’ll start to fight for us. I know that I’ve fought like hell, and I don’t plan to stop anytime soon. 

What we have now isn’t a relationship because that takes two people, not just one person putting in the effort and feeling alone all the time. You continue to push me away and keep this wall up between us. If anything, it's only helped me to grow. It proves to me that I can do it on my own because I already am. 

If things don’t work out between us, I’ll walk away knowing I gave it my all. I’ll know that I did everything I could and that I didn’t hold back. I won’t blame myself or carry any guilt.

I’ll never regret loving you too hard or holding on too tight. I’ll never apologize for fighting the way that I did because to me, it was worth it. You have always been worth it.

Whatever happens, I know I’ll get through it. I know in my heart who I am and that I’ll be okay.

And for me, that is enough.

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