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The loss of a loved one

The loss of a loved one

By: melanie ly

“Goodbyes are not forever, are not the end; it simply means I’ll miss you until we meet again.” 

On September 15, 2016, I lost my grandma. I remember hearing the news like it was yesterday. I got a text from my parents asking me to call them when I was done with all of my classes, I didn’t know what to expect. So there I was, sitting outside of my room not ready for what I was going to hear. 

“Grandma died in her sleep last night.”

In that moment right there, my heart actually shattered. I feel to the floor sobbing. I felt a pain throughout my whole body that I wouldn’t want to wish on anyone. 

 I’ve never experienced a death of someone so close to my heart. She was the most loving, vibrant, most caring human being that unfortunately had leukemia. She fought a long and hard battle hiding away because she didn’t like what it did to her. I knew she was struggling, but she never showed it. She missed events like my graduation, and my birthday/grad party. I know it’s stupid, but she’s my grandma. I wanted to share these events with her.

In the past couple of months, I have learned that you can’t just “get over” the death of someone. Instead, you find a comfort in them passing. It comforts me to know that she isn’t suffering anymore. That she doesn’t have to spend weeks at a time at a hospital hooked up to machines and drips. 

I truly believe I’ve gained a guardian angel. My grandma was my best friend. I’ve never seen her mad, she was there from the very start. She watched me grow up for 18 years. She sneakily gave my siblings and I money way too often, but it was much appreciated. She’s one of the people who turned me into the person I am today and for her, I’m eternally grateful. She deserved more time. From time to time, I find myself crying about her. Thinking she should be here. 

I miss her so much. 

The loss of a loved one affects people in different ways. Everyone grieves a different way. I cried. Alot. I’m not afraid to admit that. I didn’t know how else to handle it. It’s okay to be sad. You’re sad because you lost someone who has had a huge impact on your life and the person you became.  

I feel she will always be by my side leading me through this crazy thing we call life. 

Until we meet again, love you forever.