She's Not the Girl She Used to Be and That's Mainly Because of You
By: Brittney Lindstrom
Her heart just isn’t the same. It’s still two sizes too big, but now it’s guarded by walls that are too strong and too high to be broken down.
She’s not the fun-loving girl you once knew.
She’s not the type to drop anything and everything for just anyone anymore.
And you’re the only one to blame for this, not her.
Before you, she was happy. She was more than happy living the single girl lifestyle, doing her own thing, on her own time.
Her heart used to be able to open up to anyone, find the good in every soul, and fall in love so easy.
She was confident, secure, and completely knew who she was. Then all of a sudden this douchebag swoops in and changes love as she knows it.
When you decided to leave her heart shattered on the floor and walk away without a scratch on you, you did so much more than make her cry.
You stole any and all sense of security she once had. She’s not half as trusting as she used to be. She used to love every little thing about herself, but now all she does is over think and question everything she does.
Every insecurity she once had came rushing to the forefront of her mind, one by one. And it’s absolute torture because she didn’t ask for this. She didn’t ask to fall for a guy who decided it was OK to hide his true self and put on this facade to get her to like him.
She didn’t ask for the constant interrogations that were worse than being questioned by the police. Or the emotional withdrawal when you had manipulated your way into her mind.
And she definitely didn’t ask to be in pieces on the floor, left to her own devices to piece herself back together.
Her sleepless nights and what seemed like endless tears became a routine for her. She couldn’t get the thought of you out of her head no matter how hard she tried.
But day by day, she felt a little lighter. She could feel her heart healing and becoming stronger with each breath she took.
There's still anger and resentment towards you who, but it no longer eats her alive daily.
This experience has changed her, but it’s only for the better. She’s stronger now, thanks to you, and more aware than she used to be.
She may not have what she wants all figured out yet but she will know exactly what she doesn't want. And that counts for a lot.
She’s still a work in progress but at least she knows now she’s exactly where she’s meant to be in life, and that doesn’t include you.